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aksharamana malai verse 50

31/10/2020

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dhairiyamodumun mayyaga naada yaan
Thattazhindhen arum Arunachala

Meaning


Arunachala! Impelled by the strong desire of the ego, I tried to know your natural form in my heart, since I wasn’t worthy of it (or qualified), I lost my strength and discerning power (arivum aatralum says TRK, arivu is brains/thinking/discriminatory power, aatral is strength). Please eliminate my anxiety.


Explanation


Dhairiyam is bravery, born of ego and its strength. Ego consciousness is helpful in knowing what is outside of it not what is its natural state. For that divine grace is essential.


Just the way a ship caught in a storm in the middle of the sea is tossed and turned at teh mercy of the fury of the elements, I am caught in the midst of  the hurricane of samsara and lost my sense of  balance and equanimity/stability.

Another meaning:
When I approached you by your grace to find your real form, you destroyed the ego it was hiding behind. When I tried to attain you through the efforts of the ego (jiva bodha munaippu), my strength and intelligence were uprooted and destroyed.How strange is the difference between grace-impelled action and ego-propelled effort?
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    This is my attempt at translating T.R.Kanakammal's Nool Thirattu in English for those devotees who don't understand Tamil. Hope it helps you. Ramana Saranam! Periyava Saranam!

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